Paint to Celebrate!

陆帆 Fan Lu 

Painter • Illustrator • Educator • Wife • Mother

My name is Fan. In Chinese, 帆 is pronounced /fān/ in pinyin, meaning "All is well" and "Sailing." Drawing and painting have always provided a soothing outlet for my mind and soul. I feel grateful that God has gradually healed me through art and nature. I also give back to serving the community using art to inspire and ignite others. 

My childhood and teenage years were quite complex, for I experienced a series of challenging family issues. While I struggled spiritually and emotionally, I still made much effort to keep myself focused on excelling academically. However, as a young child and teenager, I had to suppress my genuine passion for art because my family did not support it. This lack of encouragement was not due to economic reasons but rather a stereotypical viewpoint on the value of art. I endured long-term emotional neglect from my father and emotional control from my mother. My father forced me to split out of the whole big family reunion after his second marriage and a harsh separation, never letting me and my half-sister see each other since her birth, who is supposed to be now 15 years old. This shook me on the family definition. Conversely, my father and mother set too many separate criteria for me, for my father still sees any success of mine as his honor for cultivating me. At the same time, I had to take the high responsibilities of caring for and responsing to both of my parents' changing moods, for they were unable to see me with respect as an independent individual of existence, for I enduring too much blame and misunderstanding instead of being heard authentic listening, for my shoulders were held on too much for what I was always in a state of tension and insecurity.

Being suppressed but still keeping a sunny optimism, it was a survival strategy immediately, but it made me depressed at times. Until last year, in 2024, my parents gradually apologized to me, which was unbelievable, especially my father, who came to tell me how his second daughter neglected him now, what he expected me to say? I still listened to him for respecting him as a father, and I even recommended some books for his study, but how ironic. At the beginning of this year, my grandfather passed away. My father's memorial speech mainly quoted from the books I wrote during my bachelor's degree for the whole family's interviews. Once, my father looked down at my book 12 years ago. Some people's apologies were just because of their guilt, consuming the kindness from the one who truly loved them. No matter what, for being brave enough to stand up for myself when no one supported or supported with conditions and limited compensation, no longer being controlled by my moral abduction, and choosing to live for myself! It was also a breakthrough for the spirit. 

After leaving a stable full-time job at the Natural History Museum in 2016, at age 25, I began studying art while pursuing my second master's degree; I saw it as a foundation for my art learning to give me the sense to start, because I had no systematic professional art training before. I applied to only one school in San Francisco and was accepted, so I moved to the USA. I also saw it as the beginning of my art healing journey. Through faith and art, I gradually learn to observe from different perspectives; it opens the highly sensitive senses, mind, and heart that always exist inside of me, frees me to express the ways my needs and preferences, transforms my energy and reclaims my strength. Gladness on awakening, I can be myself, the one God made me into this life. I chose to follow my heart, embracing bravery in the process, because my mental health and well-being are significant to taking care of myself. Gradually, I realized and accepted the reality that no matter the visible or invisible scars, they forever exist. Still, coming along with my brave and authentic living, they do not always bother me as they did before. I know I am getting better after so many years. I am getting healed, for I am the beloved child of God. 

I enjoy experimenting with various art projects and motifs in fine art and illustration, effortlessly transitioning between small pocket-sized sketchbooks and large canvases, covering the whole wall. God's word refreshes my spirit as I pray and paint. Reading plays a significant role in shaping and inspiring me; books have always been my best friend. I often draw and paint from my daily life and travel experiences, incorporating my emotions and reflections into my artwork. Music is another essential aspect of my life, as singing is what I love and an outlet to express my voice. Art has gradually become more than a healing tool; it is also an approach for me to express my love and gratitude while helping others.

I draw and paint joyfully, recording the little moments of happiness with gratitude. From 2016 to 2019, my many artworks were featured in two solo exhibitions and eight group shows. Since 2020, I have organized onsite art and music salons and hosted numerous online bilingual music and art storytimes and events. I also devoted myself to art ministry through various churches and our family music art ministry (visit our family website, www.FGMusicArt.com to learn more), illustrating educational books, curating my painting projects, creating custom artwork, and teaching online and in-person art classes. Additionally, I have designed and sold art products inspired by my original artwork since 2024. In 2025, I held my third solo art exhibition in Alameda, which was displayed for six weeks. I hosted a teaching event for the local community.