My name is Fan Lu (陆帆). In Chinese, "帆" (fān) means "sail" and symbolizes a journey of setting sail and smooth sailing. I was born in 1990 in Shanghai, China, and grew up there. Over the years, my academic experience has taken me through China, Australia, the UK, Italy, and the United States. In response to God's calling, I'm living out an arts missionary lifestyle shaped by a clear vision from above. For nearly ten years, I have been living in various cities in California, including San Francisco, Mountain View, Palo Alto, Piedmont, and El Cerrito. Currently, I live with my husband and our son in Alameda, a cozy, walkable, and family-friendly island city in the East Bay of the San Francisco Bay Area. And I am always ready to relocate where God calls me to go, also considering my family as a unit.
In 2013, I graduated from Shanghai Normal University with a BA in Advertising Science (Journalism and Mass Communication Studies). Upon graduation, I was awarded the Shanghai Outstanding Graduate, a prestigious municipal honour that recognizes academic excellence, leadership, and impactful community service contributions. In 2014, I achieved an MSc in Management and Organisational Innovation with Merit from Queen Mary University of London. In 2019, I gained an MA in Fine Art (with an emphasis in Drawing and Painting) at the Academy of Art University in San Francisco.
Before fully dedicating myself to the arts, I worked in public education in museums, private and public schools, and international business schools. Since 2020, I have been designing and teaching bilingual art courses, utilizing multiple teaching methods tailored for both children and adults, both online and in-person. I also curate community events that integrate the Christian faith. For me, teaching marks the beginning of a new, deeper learning experience as an aspiring educator with a growth mindset. I am also grateful to have inherited a legacy of courage, perseverance, responsibility, discipline, and self-motivation from my family of origin—values that have been passed down through generations of entrepreneurs and educators. Today, I am an independent teaching artist, a curator of cross-cultural and interdisciplinary programs, an exhibition and event organizer, a homeschooling mother, and the leader of an art ministry. For over seven years, my husband and I have been homeschooling and road-schooling our son.
Since 2016, my artwork has been exhibited in group and solo shows in Florence and several US cities. My artistic practice encompasses a diverse range of themes, utilizing mixed media in various styles and techniques. My creative voice and expression are not from nowhere, but rather deeply emerging from personal stories and the complex early-life experiences that have shaped me. Even my artwork conveyed a warm and positive message, but it was the result of internalization from my history, shaped by pain and restoration. I experienced both warmth of childhood memories from family and schools, but also endured and survived many adversities growing up in the formative years, from infancy into the my teenage years— the period when my father worked overseas, father's imprisonment, my parents' divorce, boarding-school violence, emotional neglect from father, forced isolation from my younger half-sister on his side, blame from mother, and the some particular schools' teacher's injustice. However, these hardships never wore down the strength of my heart. Instead, they transformed into my life wisdom, became a source of inner wealth, and enabled me to develop a greater strength under pressure, clearer spiritual discernment, more accurate intuition, deeper emotional insight and sensitivity, and growing resilience, especially in the complex cross-cultural contexts I encountered throughout various seasons of my life and work at different ages.
Even through trauma, I walked a disciplined path from a young age. For a long time in my teenage years, I had hoped to grow up faster, because although the material life was relatively comfortable, the mental stress and inner struggles were constantly heavy. Still, I endured them without showing, and as a thoughtful and responsible child who is always sensitive and takes care of others' feelings, I kept everything inside. At that time, there was no counseling or psychological support available in schools or society for children and teenagers like me facing emotional struggles and experiencing trauma in school and at home in the early 2000s in China. Instead, these difficulties were often met with judgment, shame, and misunderstanding. So for me, not mentioning these and drawing my attention to focus on studying well would be a protection for myself at that time. Also, in my leisure time, my intuitive doodling of abstract art became a wholly natural and instinctive outlet—a form of intuitive self-therapy that I couldn't fully understand as a teenager. Looking back now, I realize that this creative expression was my first attempt to be self-healing in the absence of external support, to relieve the increasingly depressed feelings. My mother was the closest person I could open up to, but she carried a heavy emotional weight and battled unstable emotions. It took her more than a decade to emerge from the shadows, while those around me assumed I was perfectly fine, not that too many ever asked me how I was really, for they only can see me carrying positive attitude towards life. Family and school issues during these times placed a heavy burden on my heart. But the truth is, it was too much accumulated until a time of really facing it. In my early twenties, these unhealed wounds eventually led to accumulated internal conflicts and psychological distress, which became a turning point for divine healing from the higher power. Shortly after my parents' divorce, I first came to know Christian Faith at age 12 in 2002 while at boarding school. Still, it wasn't until 2015—the year I was baptized in Shanghai—that my true journey of inner healing and transformation in faith gradually began, supported by therapy, travel, nature, arts, reading, journaling, and the belated and conditional compensation from my family of origin.
My life was not only about survival, but also about thriving day by day, year by year, not only in external achievements, but also in my inner life. God not only saved me from depression but also gradually comforted, healed, and led me into a more meaningful life with a higher mission and purpose. My faith is now the foundation of my life and art. My practice is an ongoing dialogue and deep talks between my inner world and divine spirits. I believe that God weaves everything in harmony to fulfill His purpose. Through my diverse work, whether in art, education, community service, and many other endeavors, I have bridged the gap between cultures, faith, and the hearts of generations.
Growing up with a generous and giving heart, I continue to be willing to be a vessel, compassionately passing comfort to others, with faith in God. Blessed for now, I am unconditionally loved and supported by a deeply understanding husband and a cheerful, joyful son. I am sincerely thankful for their patience and support, which has allowed me to gradually find my pace and reflect more deeply on my true self, however, the unspoken emotions, my husband can also sees in my abstract art, accept without any judgement, their love matters so much to me, and my childhood dream of a united and close family came true, I have kept learning and growing during our eighth year of marriage. My work in art and education is a meditation—quiet yet bold. It was never easy to hold onto this weightiness in a fast-paced worldview, but the true resonance is what I treasure; I care for the hearts that can see deeply, with no need for many, but with a high quality of it.
I kept walking to pursue the light, and I made an effort to become a better version of myself, but in one moment in 2025, I suddenly realized that I had already been living as a light and had always walked in the light, from my childhood and teenage life until now. It had never faded away for my true self. I am still keeping what is the best of me and am still growing. The parts of the vulnerable me I had hidden for so long were still waiting for me to be seen. It was never easy for me to bravely tell my life stories to the world, for I had held the unspoken words for the most sensitive years of my childhood and teenage life.
At the age of almost 35, it has been a gradual time of reflection on what was truly behind supporting me, the vulnerable but the strongest part of me, did the great work, with so many tears and perseverance behind my silence of these years, leading many misunderstandings and pity, for people and things. Now, it is such a relief and comfort to be back and to embrace my younger self, full of compassionate empathy, for self-affirmation. I share my art, work, and life journeys. That is all the heart and meaning of it. Everyone sees what matters to them. And my life stories, which I share here, are for those who have the sensitivity and experienced resonance, who have also encountered complex life, and can see themselves through me, who can see God's amazing grace.
The world is chaotic and biased in general, full of noise, making it easy to simplify, judge, or define those who have complex backgrounds and inner worlds and souls that hold richness and depth. However, God sees the hearts. As Jeremiah 1:5 states, "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations."
One thing I am so grateful and happy for is that I have walked a long and arduous journey to live an ordinary life. Now, the PRESENT connects my past and future!
All Glory to God!
Standing in this moment, I look back on all the past years I have been through, it's truly a deep and long way. Along the way, I rarly shared my stories with people, for people knew me as more on quiet and positive with a sunny smile, I never needed to explain myself, for I can understand others better to let them know me, I can internalize well since very young, for sure, it too some extent need an outlet, for art was a help for me, I never pursue to be an artist, but I truly live out as an artist, for Art and I choose each other. My life stage and experiences naturally lead me to express myself through art and writing as a form of self-expression and therapeutic outlet. As I will turn 35 this year in October 2025, I began writing down my experiences and stories, for I know each step has shaped me. I have so much strength in me, which I should give myself confirmation on how wonderful I have devoted myself to self-development and contribution to people around as much as I can, not for proving but just being myself, as who I was, am, and will be. NOW I can see myself. I worked hard to develop my resilience and rebuild my sense of self-worth. All the hardship experiences did not break me—they shaped my empathy, clarity, and quiet strength. Thankfully, I didn't just survive—I evolved to grow, create, heal, and give back through art, faith, and love. Every little dot is connected by lines and made into a unique one; for Life is a journey, and more miracles and blessings overflow to me.
Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. "
-James 1:2-4
I am a native Shanghainese, born and raised in a close-knit extended family in Shanghai. From six months to three years of age, while my father worked in Japan, my mother balanced her role as a public school teacher with caring for me. Both my grandmother and my mother taught at the same school. My early childhood was surrounded by warmth and collective support from my grandparents and relatives. At age ten, everything changed. My father was imprisoned for a year; despite the upheaval, my mother managed our lives with the help of our extended family, and I remained academically strong, ranking first in my fourth-grade class at the key elementary school. At that time, I knew I was a person who could thrive in the most challenging times, rise instead of being depressed, and I had a talent for grit. Shortly after my parents' divorce, at twelve, I entered a boarding school focused on foreign languages, for my mother sent me out to separate me from the low-pressure atmosphere at home and hoped for a better education, for she was still emotionally damaged, which lasted for so many years. Even though it was not my wish to go to boarding school, as a daughter who is always considerate about parents' decisions, I had no choice at such a young age during the transitional years in between elementary school and middle school. At that time, my true feeling was that the family should stay together, even if tightly, especially during the most difficult times, rather than pushing each other away. Fatefully, during this time, I came to know the Christian Faith when studying and living in the boarding school. Later on, I experienced school violence from an upperclassman. At the same time, I stood out speaking for my classmates—an incident that left a permanent scar on back of my left head and heart, which influenced me on the occasional headache, especially ached in during rainy, humid days, bring it all back, for about 20 years until 2023, that my headache was healed naturally, even the scar still was a reminder but not bother me on recalling it of the complicated emotions on these days. Despite the trauma, I transferred to the new middle school, still excelled academically, overcoming the attention distraction taken from the pain of the scars and many family issues. In ninth grade, my classmates nominated me for a prestigious high school award due to my academic achievements and character, but my teacher unjustly revoked the nomination. I later earned admission to another key high school through the Zhongkao (the Senior High School Entrance Examination). During that time, my father remarried without informing me. I only heard about it through extended family, and I was gradually excluded from his life, especially by his new wife, who saw my presence as a threat. My father remained silent, especially when I was excluded from family gatherings just before the critical Gaokao exam. I continued to perform well, serving as a class representative and receiving honors for academic excellence, moral character, and athletic achievements. When I was 18, my half-sister was born, though I only found out from my uncle, not from my father. Over the years, I was repeatedly scapegoated for things unrelated to me, especially those involving my half-sister, whom I have never been allowed to meet. My father chose to prioritize peace in his second family at the cost of our relationship. However, he contributed some essential financial support, which he gave me, felt like “paying off a debt,” as if I had been a burden rather than a daughter. Incredibly, in 2025, he apologized to me for the first time. Yet I realized he sought my forgiveness not to heal the pain he caused but to ease his guilt. He still never asked how I was, how tired I felt, or what I had gone through. Even now, he speaks only of my achievements. My mother and father, although secure in time, finances, and social resources, have never visited me in the US. However, kindly, some financial help was provided during hard times, but limited emotional support and zero physical companionship to me through milestones like graduation, marriage, childbirth, or raising my son, now seven years old. All these significant life moments for me, without my parents, were once painful, but now time makes these feelings fade away. They often offered control and blame rather than care. For a very long time, I have always felt ashamed, even though I thought like my classmates. I have a relatively warm-hearted campus life, often seen as part of a happy family. I had to internalize myself so that I could be generally positive, but I now fully accept that they never gave me unconditional love. I spent years trying to be “the good daughter,” carrying burdens that were never mine. At 34, I am finally learning to lay those burdens down one by one. I am no longer willing to sacrifice myself to gain their love or approval. Indeed, I will also cherish the fond memories of my parents in my heart. Yet I remain grateful: what they couldn’t give me, God did. I’ve learned to cultivate joy, create meaning, and pursue learning at every stage of life. I’ve earned every opportunity I’ve had through resilience, integrity, and faith. Though I was rarely seen or heard by my parents, I chose not to disappear. I became a mother who listens, an artist who expresses, and an educator who empowers others. I am healing—slowly but surely. It has been a long and arduous journey to live an ordinary life.
I entered Shanghai Chuansha High School through the Zhongkao (the Senior High School Entrance Examination). In my senior year of high school, I received the “Three-Good Student” award in 2009. This award recognizes students who demonstrate good morals, strong academic performance, and good physical health—attributes of well-rounded and excellent students. I also studied abroad in Australia during my high school summer program in 2007, it was also the time I encoutered to know more about Christian Faith. Although my Gaokao (The Nationwide Unified Examination for Admissions to General Universities and Colleges) scores were not ideal compared to my regular academic performance, I was assigned to my admitted major based on my one-time Gaokao exam result and studied at Shanghai Normal University, where I majored in a BA in Advertising Science (Journalism and Mass Communication Studies). There, I received academic scholarships for three consecutive years and graduated with a “Shanghai Outstanding Graduate” award in 2013. For my master’s studies, I applied to multiple prestigious UK universities and received offers from eight schools, including the University of Leeds and the University of Glasgow. Ultimately, I chose Queen Mary University of London because I preferred living in London, where I earned an MSc in Management and Organisational Innovation with Merit classification. After full-time work in a museum, I then applied to only one school, the Academy of Art University in San Francisco, and was accepted. I graduated in 2019 with an MA in Fine Art with an emphasis on Drawing and Painting, including a summer term study abroad program in Florence, Italy.
From 2010 to 2011, I worked as a translator for China's Chief Representative of the New York Advertising Festival, assisting with academic research, email correspondence, and translating promotional materials. In 2012, I interned at the MBA Admissions Office of China Europe International Business School (CEIBS), where I assisted with organizing MBA candidate application data, helped coordinate recruitment events, and proctored exams. In 2013, I interned at the Harvard Center Shanghai, where I assisted with professional education programs, including lecture preparation, event logistics, and post-event coordination. In 2015, after passing the highly competitive public sector institution examination and interview, I became a full-time public staff under China's public institution system (known as the "bianzhi" system, which offers stable and long-term, government-funded employment) at the public welfare institution, Shanghai Natural History Museum (a branch of the Shanghai Science and Technology Museum) as a museum educator and exhibition area & volunteers management. The year I joined, I also witnessed the reopening of the Shanghai Natural History Museum in its new location, featuring amazing architecture specially designed. My work experience in the museum was diverse, ranging from detailed tasks such as basic facility checks and environmental maintenance to coordinating within exhibition spaces to ensure a seamless visitor experience to highly self-directed projects involving the application of research funds or designing my own educational "gallery talk" in scientific knwoledge with natural-themed related to the exhibition and educational projects for the public, among other responsibilities. I occasionally offered interpretive support for the Exhibits of animal and plant specimens. Also, I individually designed and successfully launched educational small "gallery talks" on the permanent collections in one of the exhibition areas I was responsible for, where I freely selected my research topic. I successfully applied for the limited opportunity to rotate in the education center, where I taught specific educational programs to students during elementary school field trip visits to the museum. I successfully applied for the highest research funds available at that time, as this was truly an experience and a lasting memory. For my non-science academic background, it was a significant challenge, accompanied by a lot of pressure. However, I was also motivated to take a step. I received encouragement from my mentor at the museum, who always encouraged me to keep learning whenever I had a good attitude and a learning heart. I began with a small idea based on my regular work observations and visitor communications, and I am very grateful for the professional help that is abundant around me. I was always pleased to have good communication in cross-departmental collaborations. My research proposal focused on the "Exploration of the studies and accuracy of scientific illustrations in the dioramas depicting Coniferous Forests in the museum's ecosystem exhibition." Also, it required a presentation to the board committee, which included members from outside the museum, despite most of my colleagues in a similar position not expecting me to apply for the highest funds. Out of all the surprises, it was a success and approved, and was seen as valuable by real professionals! What I learned from that is that everything is possible. It was another practice of mine to integrate Art and science, as it expands my way of exploring interdisciplinary approaches, and reveals more depth in art and science, weaving in aesthetics. of thinking, how beautiful nature and life are! And more, I also successfully wrote and published an article on the museum official platform "growth rings of the trees" topic with the professional scientific date academic support from my specific science mentor from the museum reserach team, which reflects my interest in the subject, as well as being related to one of the areas of the museum for which I was responsible. I was also part of the team for the Museum Visitor Experience Research Project. I participated in performing in the institutional choir, which won first place in a Municipality-level competition among science institutions. It was a very enriching work experience, full of challenges but offering many opportunities to learn and improve, to rebuild myself at a life stage and in my faith, as well as to cultivate a more curious mind to explore the true nature of life. Although I contributed and delivered some meaningful results to my workplace, I made a little difference, to some extent. Even though I became increasingly accustomed to working at the museum, I gradually adapted to the very complex atmosphere within a unique public institution system. I also had a great balance between my work and personal life. However, I still chose to trust and obey in responding to God's calling on me to "Go Painting!" Also, 2015 was very important for I was baptised in Shanghai. Then, I resigned in 2016 to pursue my passion for art and further my art studies in the United States. Overall, I was fortunate to meet and get help from great mentors and open-minded top leaders with strong work ethics in various workplaces throughout my non-art-related professional work experience.
Since 2016, my artwork has been showcased in eight group exhibitions across Florence, Italy, as well as in San Francisco, Palo Alto, Alameda, San Leandro, and Pleasanton in the United States. In 2019, I held my first two solo exhibitions in Alameda, titled "Landscape and Memory: The Traveling Series of Landscape Paintings." That same year, I also organized and curated four community-based art and music events, including "Spark Joy" and "Parenting with Art" in Alameda, as well as the "Sailing Boat Art and Music Salon" in Oakland. From 2020 to 2022, I planned and successfully hosted approximately forty-five free online Zoom events for the community, including regular bilingual storytime music and art sessions, family music ministry, reading clubs, and art events, ensuring there was something for everyone, most of the participants were American Chinese from different cities in the US, China, and elsewhere. In 2024, I began designing original art products and gospel-themed gifts inspired by my illustrations and paintings. In 2025, I held my third solo exhibition, "A Blooming Joy: Walking Through Music, Travels, and Faith," in Alameda, which was displayed for six weeks. This exhibition featured a teaching event related to the theme I designed and taught, which was open to the local community. In addition to these public projects, I have illustrated educational books and created commissioned artwork on various themes, including landscapes, scripture, music, education, and more.
From 2017 to 2019, I have also continuously cherished the chance to enrich my teaching experience part-time, including designing and teaching bilingually in art-integrated Mandarin language learning in the local educational and language institutes of summer camps and after-school programs, being the substitute teacher in a Christian elementary school and several public and private secondary schools, and volunteering to teach art in children's museum throughout the San Francisco Bay Area in several cities such as San Mateo, Oakland, Alameda, Redwood, San Leandro. In 2020, I expanded my practice to include online, bilingual art courses for students aged five and older, primarily from the United States and China. My teaching is deeply rooted in faith, and I believe that educators should cultivate an environment that fosters learning and nurtures each student’s unique existence and expression. I design multidisciplinary courses that incorporate various mixed media, including graphite pencils, charcoal pencils, colored pencils, pastels, watercolor, gouache, acrylic, oil, ink & pen, markers, and digital tools such as iPad Procreate and Photoshop. In addition to my teaching, I collaborate with my husband, Dr. Samuel Bai, to lead our family music and art ministry. We serve the local community in the San Francisco Bay Area as well as international Christian groups. In 2018 to 2019, I was involved in different creative art, musical, or visual art projects locally in the SF Bay Area, in Castro Valley, and Alameda. Since 2020, various Chinese Christian organizations and institutions in both the US and China have invited me to collaborate on art commissions, art teaching, art lectures, illustrating faith-based educational textbooks, and publishing my artwork with gospel messages monthly in one of the largest Chinese Christian newspapers for evangelization, among other projects. Since 2022, I have co-led, alongside my husband, Dr. Samuel Bai, the Family Music Art Ministry (www.FGMusicArt.com), which integrates creative arts and science education, serving Christian communities both locally and globally. Together, we have homeschooled and roadschooled our son, Bamboo, for seven years through a faith-inspired, bilingual learning model that integrates the arts and sciences in a unique and personalized way, fostering creativity, spiritual growth, and lifelong learning. Also, these years were a challenging time for our family, because my husband, who had graduated with a PhD in Biochemistry, then decided to pursue a music career. At the same time, I gave birth to my son in 2017 while I was pursuing a second master's degree in Fine Arts. We continue to explore and grow together. I am grateful for the unwavering love from my son, who continually encourages me.
After leaving my full-time job at the Natural History Museum in 2016, I came to the USA to study painting. It was a calling for me to paint. It is an important work given to me by God. My artwork—especially landscapes—is a celebration of God’s magnificent creation in nature. The process of painting and praying has become a way for me to dwell in His presence. As I create, I find myself renewed by His word and inspired by the beauty that reflects His glory. Through community-based projects and personal work, I hope to encourage appreciation for nature, inspire gratitude for life, and invite others to seek true peace and joy in God. Drawing and painting have always provided a soothing outlet for my mind and soul. Over the years, I’ve experienced God’s healing through both art and nature. I now offer these gifts in service to others. My practice spans from tiny sketchbooks to wall-sized canvases, from intuitive expression to thoughtful storytelling. Reading continues to nurture my inner world; books have always been my companions and guides. I often draw from everyday moments, travels, and quiet reflections—integrating emotion and faith into my work. Music is another essential aspect of my life, as singing is what I love and an outlet to express my voice. Ultimately, art has become more than a personal outlet—it is an offering of love, gratitude, and healing. I choose to draw and paint joyfully, recording the little moments of happiness with gratitude.
I am gladly walking in the light! I created mixed-media collage art of myself based on my walking in Paris. Sometimes, you are chasing the light to go out of the darkness. Sometimes, you realize you are the light in the darkness to illuminate the path ahead! How I write is how I talk to myself.